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The Secret of the Sword

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"I've got that flying horsey in my sight" He-Man & the Masters of the Universe was a massive hit toy line and a massive hit animated TV series. He-Man ruled the airwaves in the 80s and it would only make sense to not only make a feature length theatrical film but also a new spin-off series with a new character! The film follows Price Adam/He-Man as he embarks on the search for his twin sister. Turns out that a new villain by the name of Hordak had kidnapped He-Man's twin sister shortly after birth and taken here to another dimension on a planet called Etherea. No one knows what happened to the little girl, Adora. But, with this information and with a magical sword, He-Man is on his way to find Princess Adora.  What much can be said of "The Secret of the Sword", it's not necessarily a film for cinemas as there is nothing special enough about the movie for it to warrant a theatrical release, other than the length of the film. The animation remains the

Human Centipede *



Never in my life did I think that I would see a movie like this. Well, I mean, a movie like this that isn't a send-up of 50's sci-fi movies. This is an ugly movie. A movie that you kick yourself for watching, but can't look away from.

The movie centers around American girls who are on a road trip in Germany. Their car breaks down and they find shelter at the only house they can find. Upon waking up they find themselves being taken captive by a man who is a retired surgeon. This man, who has specialized in separating siamese twins, informs that girls that he has kidnapped them so he can perform a twisted experiment. He plans on combining the two girls with a man, who has also been kidnapped, to create the world's first human centipede.

This concept could have gone in a very lightly, jokey direction but this movie is deadly serious. Of course the idea is absurd, but the director, Tom Six, makes sure that the movie can be believable. The thought that a mad doctor would kidnap people only to make them into a human centipede is the kind of idea that gets you thinking, and, for the most part, our questions are answered.

There are only two reasons to watch this movie. The first is the obvious attraction of the title and description of the movie. After viewing the trailer, we know exactly what we are going to get and the movie delivers. The second reason is for the performance of Dieter Laser as the doctor. He is very creepy and plays the determination of getting the procedure done with a sly wink. In terms of horror movie performances, Laser's is the best of the year so far.

Human Centipede is a movie strictly for the geek show crowd. Anybody going into this movie thinking that it is going to be a fun time will be shocked and disturbed. This is one of the most disturbing movies I have seen in a long time and the fact that there is going to be a sequel disturbs me even more.

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