Latest Review

The Secret of the Sword

"I've got that flying horsey in my sight" He-Man & the Masters of the Universe was a massive hit toy line and a massive hit animated TV series. He-Man ruled the airwaves in the 80s and it would only make sense to not only make a feature length theatrical film but also a new spin-off series with a new character! The film follows Price Adam/He-Man as he embarks on the search for his twin sister. Turns out that a new villain by the name of Hordak had kidnapped He-Man's twin sister shortly after birth and taken here to another dimension on a planet called Etherea. No one knows what happened to the little girl, Adora. But, with this information and with a magical sword, He-Man is on his way to find Princess Adora.  What much can be said of "The Secret of the Sword", it's not necessarily a film for cinemas as there is nothing special enough about the movie for it to warrant a theatrical release, other than the length of the film. The animation remains the

Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday 1/2*

The "Friday the 13th" series had been around for 13 years when New Line Cinema, who acquired the rights from Paramount, decided that it was time for a new "Jason" movie. But instead of giving us a true "Jason" movie, they gave us an utter mess.

The movie start out promising. A young woman is alone in a cabin, about to take a shower, when Jason shows up. She exits the cabin, fleeing for her life, with Jason in pursuit. Then out of nowhere lights shine into the forest and a voice says "freeze!". The F.B.I. has set Jason up.. But before he can do anything they blow him up. He is now out of the picture until the last reel.

So now you are asking yourself "How is this a Jason movie with no Jason?" Well, the answer is, in name alone. The way they play this off is by having Jason's "soul" transfer from body to body whenever the screenplay requires it. This leads to some of the dumbest scenes I have seen in horror movies.

Probably the dumbest scene in the movie is how Jason's soul takes over the first body. The coroner is examining Jason's remains when he suddenly has a craving to eat Jason's heart.. Now I can take almost anything that a slasher movie has to offer, but this plot line is just plain stupid.

When Jason does reenter the picture the movie is almost over. He fights the two leads and then get sent to hell. If the whole movie would have been like this then we might have had a pretty decent "Jason" movie.

After "Jason Goes to Hell" was released, it took New Line another nine years before they released another "Jason" movie. On the basis of that movie and the recent remake, it seems that New Line wouldn't know a good "Jason" movie if it bit them in the ass..


Popular posts from this blog

The Phantasm Sphere Collection (Well Go USA) Blu-ray Review